JAG Continues

JAG Continues                                                                                Book II:  Volatile Matters

Ch. 4 -  Visions of the Dynamic Duo

Part D

In Harm’s apartment they resumed their discussion about where Mac should stay during the time Harm would be at the luncheon.  Harm continued to argue that she did not need to be nearby him, because he would be safe.

“Instead of wasting your time doing low tech, long range surveillance on me,” said Harm, “I think you should go see Mattie this afternoon.”

“Harm, if we determine that you’re not in any danger, then neither are the rest of us, and we can both go see Mattie later today as promised.”

“No can do.  We’ve got plans for later.”

“Since when?”

“Since earlier.”

“What plans?”

“Important ones,” he stressed.

“More important than visiting Mattie?”

Harm paused for a moment.  “Than my visiting Mattie today - Yes.”

“Are you going to tell me what the plans are?”

“Not yet.”

“What if I don’t want to go along with your plans?”

“Our plans,” he corrected.

“How can they be our plans, if I haven’t helped make them?” complained Mac.

“If you agree to them, that makes them our plans.  And you should agree to them.”

“Maybe if I knew what they were …”  She was fishing.

He didn’t bite.  “You trusted me with plans last evening.”

“Is tonight going to be like last evening?”  Mac couldn’t imagine that would be possible, given the magnitude of the evening before, with his official marriage proposal.

“No.  It’s not going to be nearly as fabulous as last evening, … but I have a feeling it’s going to be just about as important.”

“Do these plans involve this Howrani situation?”

“No, they assume that no complications arise with regards to that.”

Mac could see she was getting nowhere in determining what he was thinking about doing in the evening.  She changed tactics.  “Harm, I promised Mattie that ‘we’ would visit.  Don’t make me a liar.”

“That’s one of the reasons why I think you should ask Coates to go with you.  You never actually specified to Mattie that ‘we’ referred to you and me.”

Mac shook her head.  “Mattie must hate being parented by a lawyer who knows how to find loopholes,” she mused playfully. 

“Believe me, I’ve got nothing on her when it comes to finding loopholes – she’s a teenager!”

Mac smiled at that.  Her grin lessened though as she asked, “Is this what you wanted to ask Jen last night?  If she would go with me to visit Mattie today?”

“Yes,” he admitted, “that’s why I asked if she had plans for today.  … You’re very perceptive, you know?”

“I try.”

“I didn’t think that last night you’d appreciate the suggestion that Jen go with you.”

“I wouldn’t have.  Especially since I thought you were trying to get rid of me today.”

Harm sat on the couch.  “Come here, Mac.”  She sat next to him, and he put his arm around her, bringing her close.  “I always want you with me if I can.”

“I know.”  She snuggled against him.

“But there’s no point in you following me this afternoon,” he said tenderly.  “… I’ll keep my cell phone on.”

Mac knew Harm was going to be stubborn about this.  Her mind started calculating some options.  In the meantime, she might at least use her possible acquiescence as bargaining power.  “… Alright,” she said, “- I’ll go see Mattie without you, if you tell me what you’re planning that’s so important tonight.”

Harm reached over for his cordless phone and started dialing.

“Who are you calling?”

“Coates.”

“She’s right next door.  Why are you calling?”

“Because I don’t want to let you out of my arms unless I have to … Hi Jen.  It’s Harm.  Listen, when you get this message, can you come over here?  I have to go out in a little bit, but I was wondering if you’d like to take a drive with Mac this afternoon to visit Mattie.  Thanks.  Bye.”

“You’d better be willing to tell me what you’re planning now,” Mac stated with authority after Harm hung up.

He set the phone down and paused before responding.  “I’ve reserved a room for us.”

Mac’s face went straight and her heart rate jumped.  “I thought we were waiting?”

“No!” Harm said as he realized Mac’s misinterpretation.   “… I mean yes, … we are.  Uh, what I reserved is a private room at a gym, … like you mentioned.  For us to …”

Mac stared at him.  “… work out?”

Harm nodded and looked away.  “Work things out … if that’s what you want.  You know, to talk about -”

“- things we’ve tabled,” Mac finished.

Again, he nodded.

“You’ve actually set up a time when you will be willing to listen to me?  And to open up to me?”

“Well, I’ve set up a time for us to work out.  And I promise that no matter what you might say or ask me during that time … I will at least not leave the room …  And you’d better not either.”

Mac looked at him in acknowledgement.  “I won’t.”

“Good, because the room is costing us a fortune, and we’d both better be making the most of every minute.”

“When did you reserve it?”

“This morning, while you were showering.”

Mac was impressed.  “You made a lot of calls in ten minutes.”

“I told you, I can get a lot done when I’m motivated.”

She smiled before checking, “And you’re actually willing to talk about … anything.  I mean, nothing’s off limits?”

Harm paused and swallowed hard.  He looked away again.  What he wouldn’t give to make all the rough parts of their pasts go away.  But maybe that’s why they needed to talk more.  Maybe those things needed to be properly buried.  “Whatever you want.”

Mac knew this was going to be hard for him.  He’d already opened up so much over the past few days.  That had already astounded her.  But there was still so much more inside him that she needed to know.  And there were things going on inside of her too that she needed to tell him.  “Thank you.”  

Heck, Mac knew it was going to be hard for her too.  It had never exactly been easy for her to open up either, especially in recent times.  She had been the queen of pushing Harm away.

Harm looked back at Mac.  “Thank you, by the way.”

“For?”

“For finding me this morning.  I’m really sorry about disappearing on you.  I should have let you know before I ran off.”

“Yes, you should have,” she sternly agreed.  “When I couldn’t find you …”  She started to get a little emotional.  “… I had all these horrible scenarios flashing through my head, and my insides just …  I don’t know, … but I wouldn’t give in to it.  I couldn’t.”

Harm held her hand.  “How did you find me?”

“I … don’t know.  I pushed all the thoughts and feelings aside except that I needed to get to you.  When I couldn’t find any clues, I had to employ whatever I do have.  I thought to myself, ‘if I could find you in the ocean …’  

“I just focused like my life depended on it. … I guess, in a way, it did.”  She met his eyes with her own, slightly glassy with moisture.  “I need you.”

Harm closed his eyes and held her tighter.  “I’m sorry I scared you.”

“I’m just glad you’re okay.”

He opened his eyes and nodded.  “So, how did you do it?  I mean, was it visions or what?”

“I can’t explain it.  There were some images, but … mostly it was just … I don’t know … I just intuitively knew where to go.”

“I’m really lucky you can do that.”  He brought his fingers up and caressed her cheek.  “You’re amazing.  You know that?”

“I’ve been told that,” she smiled up at him until his mouth came down on hers in a long kiss that left her thinking he was pretty amazing too.

Mac desperately wanted to reciprocate in a big way.  But at the moment, she didn’t trust herself to maintain control if they let things proceed.  Maybe it was due to her emotional relief in response to her earlier fear that Harm may have been killed or kidnapped.  … Oh, who was she kidding? – It was nine years of wanting and who knows how many of actually being in love with this man!

Harm was now kissing her gently on the neck, and she knew she needed to break the momentum if she wanted to stick to their agreement.  

“Don’t you have to be getting ready for your date?” she asked mockingly.  She thought the comment about him spending time with another woman would cool her off, if not him.  She was wrong.

“I’ve got time.”  He kissed her again on the lips, to which she couldn’t help but respond.

“mmmm … then we have to do something to fill up the time, but I’m … finding this particular activity -”  They fully kissed again.  “… a little too tempting right now,” she finished.

“Why aren’t we eloping again?” Harm asked without much thought, before redirecting his kisses to her neck once more.

“Umm … owing other people, I think?”

“What about …” he kissed her lips again, “what we owe ourselves?”

That was it.  Mac knew her resistance was wearing thin.  Even if Harm was in control of himself, she found it difficult to keep herself from turning into the aggressor.  And he wasn’t slowing his attack on her senses.

“Harm … we need to … do something … else.”

He knew she was right, but he couldn’t seem to help his actions any more than he could control his elevated heart rate.  “What do you have in mind?” he asked between soft kisses on the side of her face.

“Stop for a second, and maybe I can think!”

Harm reluctantly pulled away from her and put some distance between them on the couch.  Her tone had been harsh.  Not mean, but urgent enough for him to understand that he should stop immediately.

She saw the slight hurt in his face.  “I’m sorry, Harm.  That … came out too strong.  I’m just …”  She took a deep breath and sighed.  Then she smiled gently.  “I did like what you were doing.  Just a little too much, if we’re …”

He softly smiled back.  “I know.”  He closed his eyes for a moment and exhaled.

Mac collected her thoughts.  “Harm, about our wedding …”

“Yeah?”

“When we said ‘as soon as reasonably possible,’ what time frame were you thinking?”

“Literally … as soon as possible to get the arrangements together.  I don’t know how long that takes, but like I said before, if I could marry you today I would.”

Mac smiled vibrantly now.  She couldn’t help it.  Hearing him talk about wanting to marry her warmed her heart.  “Now that I have a few days, I want to work on arrangements with you before I have to leave.”

“I’d like that,” he agreed.

“I want to figure out how soon we can do this.  I know most people would say it takes at least six months to plan a wedding, but for what we want I don’t think it will take that long.  The biggest issues are scheduling with regards to a place, figuring out when we can both take leave, and giving anyone who needs to travel here enough notice.”

“So what’s your time frame?”

“I’d like us to be married within the next two months.”

“… I can live with that.”

“Okay then.  We’ll settle on a date before I leave.”  She had satisfied herself.  Maybe this would be easier once they knew exactly how long they would have to deny themselves, knowing there was an end in sight.  

Then, of course, she was supposed to leave within the week, assuming no complications.  So they would probably be apart for much of the remaining time anyhow.  That would be hard on them emotionally, but it would nullify their current struggle.  They could do this, and it would be worth it.  She was actually excited about the concept of holding off their physical union to consummate their marriage.  It was entirely novel to her, but so was this kind of love.

Still, she almost regretted having the sense that they owed other people a ceremony, because otherwise she could easily agree to the idea of eloping before she left for San Diego.

Remembering the people they ‘owed a ceremony,’ Mac suddenly had a thought as to what they should do right now.  “Harm, do you have a phone that can be put on speaker?”

Harm’s thoughts, which were fixed on wishing he was already married to the woman next to him, were interrupted by her question.  “Um, yeah.  On my desk.  Why?”

“I thought we could have some fun.”

He cocked an eyebrow up at her.

“I’m going to try again to get a hold of Chloe,” she explained.  “And I have a feeling you might enjoy listening in while I share our news.”

“Listen in?  I don’t get to talk to her too?”

“It’d be more fun if you don’t – at least not right away.”

A large smile crept over his face.  “Okay. … Are you sure?”

“Yes.  But,” she pointed a finger at him, “only if you agree to several things.  After all, I am allowing you privileged access to a private conversation.”

“What do I need to agree to?”

“You can’t say anything until I tell you it’s okay – not a word, not a sound, and perhaps the most difficult, no laughing.  If she hears you, the whole thing’s ruined.”

“Okay.”

“And you have to be patient while I tell her in my own way.”

“Fine.  Aren’t you worried that she’ll say something to embarrass you since she won’t know I’m listening?”

“Harm, I can’t keep her from saying things that embarrass me when she does know you’re listening.  Which brings me to the next rule – I reserve the right to deny anything she says.”

“She’s embarrassed you in front of me before?” Harm asked, slightly jesting.  “I don’t remember her saying anything for you to be embarrassed about.”

Mac gave him a look of disbelief.  “Oh, I don’t know … how about when she told you that you were all I talked about and that she thought what I was telling her were my fantasies about you?”

Harm grinned.  “Did you have fantasies about me?”

Mac blushed, which should have been answer enough, but Harm pushed on.  “Hey, I’ve already admitted to fantasizing about you from the first time we worked together.”

“You didn’t tell me it was from the first time we worked together.”

“You don’t think I never revisited the notion of you and me in the back of that truck?  So ‘fess up, did you have fantasies about me?”

Mac looked at the ceiling for a moment before responding.  “… Of course.  But I didn’t tell them to Chloe!”

Harm beamed in triumph.  But he’d save the follow-up conversation he’d like to have for another time.  “So what did you tell Chloe?” he asked instead.

“Just the facts about you.  I can’t help that you’re larger than life.”

At that, he smiled wickedly.  “You don’t know how large I am yet.”

“… Ohhh, definite red light!”  Mac’s eyes had grown wide once she realized what Harm was referring to.

“What?” Harm tried to be ignorant.

“Don’t play innocent with me.”

“Alright, I won’t.  We have a phone call to make.”  Harm stood up and walked over to his desk.  “What about Chloe’s privacy?  I don’t want to eavesdrop on anything personal she says to you.”

“I think her reactions to us are fair game – call it my payback for countless embarrassing and otherwise difficult moments she’s caused me.”  Mac stood up and went over to where Harm was now sitting at his desk.  

She leaned against him and instinctively ran her hands through his hair.  “But I’ll let her know that you’re on the line by the time we would move on to other topics.  And another rule … if she starts to say something that’s personal to her and I don’t think you should hear it, I take it off speaker immediately.” 

“I guess that works.”

“Hey, I’m not really planning on breaking that unwritten teenager-adult privilege either,” Mac insisted.

He pulled her down onto his lap.  “So why are you letting me listen in at all?  What’s in this for you?  Just payback to Chloe?”

“No.  It’s just I imagine this will be entertaining.  And it’s always more enjoyable when you get to share entertainment with someone.”

“You want to share this experience with me?”

“Uh-huh,” she agreed before giving him a quick kiss on the forehead.  “Of course,” Mac continued, “now that I made a big deal out of it, her reaction will probably be very boring just to spite me.  That is, if she’s even there for me to talk to her.  It’s been harder and harder for me to get a hold of her these days.”

“Mmm.  They grow up so fast and move on with their lives.”

Mac picked up the phone and started dialing.  “Listen to you, … sounding like an old parent.”  

Harm smiled warmly at that.  “Isn’t she going to be tipped off about our news by seeing that you’re calling from my place?” he asked.

“No, her grandmother doesn’t have Caller ID.”  When Mac finished dialing, she put it on speaker as they listened to it ring.  

Harm tightened his embrace on her.  Having her so close to him, he couldn’t get over how good she smelled, even with traces of their earlier woods adventure still lingering about her, mixing in with her heavenly scent.

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To be continued in Visions of the Dynamic Duo, Part E